Boys and Girls can be friends.

Recently I've been back on the whole dating seen, why not I'm 22, it's fun to date and have a little fun.

And I recently went for a drink with a lovely guy, this was not a date! I repeat was NOT a date, we were simply meeting up for a casual drink as we were both free. It was lovely, had a couple of pints, walked back home lovely. Anyway, I got home, sat down, checked my phone and he'd text me... 'so would you like to be my girlfriend?'. Now don't get me wrong I was flattered, but I made it clear from the beginning that I did not like this person in this way. And then all hell broke lose. The texts read something like this:

'you bitch'

'why would you lead me on like that?'

you utter bitch, why would you go on a date with me' 

Okay, well those are just some of them. I replied nicely, and he continued with the abuse, and a lot of swearing. Bit uncalled for. It was hard to explain over text, and he wouldn't listen. but the best one he wrote:

'WHY DID YOU FRIEND-ZONE ME'

And that was it! I couldn't believe it! So, sooo angry! There is no such thing as friend-zoning, I am sorry that I do not find you attractive, we are great friends why does it have to be more than that? It really annoyed me. I simply asked if he rather I pretended to fancied him, lead him on and then a few months down the line dumb him? He didn't like that! But I feel that it was the right answer. I feel that I did the right thing. I did not lead anyone on, from the start I made it clear that we were friends and nothing more, and okay he liked me differently but that does not mean I have to feel the same. I am the one with my own feelings why should I change them to suit you? Please stop using the term 'friend-zone' as an excuse! You cannot control how others feel, its not fair or right. 

Sadly, we are no longer friends or talking which really sucks, because we talked a lot, had a lot in common. It's a shame something like this has come between our friendship. But I hope we will sort this out. 

You cannot force your feelings onto someone else, that's not how it works! 

Love yah 

Isthataredherring 

August 19th 2016

Currently loving...
Band: Scouting for Girls
Film: We bought a Zoo
Book: The Cursed Child by J.K. Rowling
Product: Dove, Summer Revived
Game: Pokemon (obvs)
Drink: Almond Dark Chocolate milk (Alpro)
Food: Couscous

This month I have been revisiting old loves of mine, and the biggest one is the band Scouting for Girls. I honestly forgot how much I loved them, and quickly found myself singing, if not a little out of tune (okay a lot out of tune) to the songs. It took me right back to when I was in year 10, (some 7 if not 8 years ago), Elvis isn't dead, the heartbeat song and of course She's so lovely. And yes I ended up watching Angus, Things and Perfect Snogging. I also found out that they are touring!!! So, I might have to get me some tickets.

Little update. 
As you guys know I am on a health kick. Out with the old and in with the new and all that jazz. This week I have thoroughly enjoyed trying new healthy foods and found my love for couscous, this stuff is a life saver, some boiling water is all you need and boom healthy meal, I add chicken and loads of veg to mine. I can never finish it all which is great, because when I undoubtedly get a little hungry later on I can finish off my lunch. In my first week I lost a total of 6lb which I was over the moon about, and the second week a total of 9lb. So, as you can imagine I am a very happy girlie right now.

I also purchased a new bike and I love it. It is so pretty and beautiful. (see below) I was lucky my local Halfords have a deal at the moment on bikes and accessories 20% off all bicycles and 3 for 2 on accessories. I couldn't resist, it is beautiful :).  I am of course going to get matching basket and saddle bag, I'd be silly not to.

Also, this month I got a new tattoo, by the wonderfully talented Sophie of Skin Wizard in Thatcham. I am beyond happy with the tattoo, it means a lot to me. The photo does not do this beauty justice. 

That has been my month so far, I hope you liked my little update. Until next time..

Love yah

IsThataRedHerring 

Learning to say no!

I have always been that person who wants to help. Even if it means I end up worse off. But recently I have decided that I need to start saying no to things. Some people may think that I am being selfish, but I have decided that I need to start doing things for me. Not anyone else. If I don't want to do something (obviously a valid reason, not just to please someone else) then I am going to say NO! 

July has been a very big month for me, the month of NO! But also positive thinking and making much needed changes in my life. SO what happened?

I handed in my notice at work 

I got a new job

I turned 22

I became single

I passed my theory test 

I had my hair cut and I am back to a natural hair colour

I made this month about me! 

Okay so they might not be massive changes but for me they were the step in the right direction. I have become more independent and focused on myself. Making much needed changes. This time last year I pledged to lose weight. And well I mean I'm not any heavier than  was last year, I am about 3lb lighter than last year. Small bonuses, but safe to say I am not happy with that. So that really needs to change. And I know I can do it, because I did lose a stone of weight in a couple of months, but I started to get comfortable in a relationship and I let everything slip. So, no more buses, I've got my bike out (and helmet). I've taken before photos, of my current weight and what my body looks like now, printed them off and stored them in a secret location. In a couple of months I might write a blog post showing my progress. 

The most important thing is that I am doing this for me and no-one else. No man to impress but simply to prove to myself that I can be healthy and happy with being me. I am not going to starve myself, I am going to do this properly and if you want to do this with me then I'd love it if you'd join me. Make it a weekly or monthly thing. I don't need to know how much you weight or your measurements but we can be there to encourage each other. If you'd like that let me know, because I certainly would. 

Thanks for listening 

Always do things for you. Be a little selfish every now and again

BE HAPPY!

Love yah 

IsThataRedHerring 

A leap of faith.

I have taken it upon myself to quit my job without having another to go to. I have 2 months to find a new job! Let the journey begin.

Okay, it really isn't that dramatic, but I have in fact handed my notice in at my current job as a support worker for children and young adults with severe autism and learning difficulties with challenging behaviour (yes that's a mouth full). My current job was supposed to fill the gap between my previous job and going back to university. However, I decided to put university off for another year making it two! Although I love my current job as a support worker I know that it is time for me to move on and pursue the career I really want. Which in the long run will be an end of life care nurse. Many people with I am morbid because I want to work with those who are dying but for me the job is much more than that.

5 reasons why I want to be an end of life care nurse:

1. I was born to care for people. Caring for people is in my nature
2. Knowing that the person is dying with dignity and the best care they can possibly receive makes the job worthwhile
3. Knowing that I am making that person comfortable and reassuring them they are safe is very important. Dying is a scary thing, but I want to make the process easier on them and their families.
4. Dying is a personal and very private thing. I want to be with them to ensure they are happy and have everything they could need to pass away peacefully.
5. And finally, because I know that I would be good at the job. I am passionate, caring and loyal, and have the best interests of the person at heart.

Many people think I am crazy for handing in my notice without having a job to go to first. But I believe it is the right decision. I have had two interviews so far, and I have been offered 1 job and awaiting to hear back from the other (the one I really want). The jobs I have gone for a care assistant jobs in care homes for the elderly. Both jobs offer opportunities to develop as senior health care assistants, nurses etc. Whilst writing this I have had a phone call with an interview for a slightly different job. Still as a care assistant but for adults with learning difficulties. Something else for me to think about.

A bit of a different post for you all, I will let you know what happens. Fingers crossed and all that.

Here's to next time.

Love yah

IsThataRedHerring 

HELLO lovely people.

I've been procrastinating! Now there's a surprise HA.

It's been a while and I have attempted to write a new post a fair few times. I have deleted 14 drafts of posts because I just didn't like them or want to finish them. So hopefully I will actually finish this one.

I thought I'd show you my latest plus size clothing order, this time it was from Forever21, the UK website. My first ever order consisted of 3 dresses and 1 playsuit. I love 3 out of the 4 I love, 1 of the dressed was a bit meh only because it was a little bit tight. However it only cost me £5ish so the best thing to do is for me to lose weight. Which I am still doing by the way! The picture below shows you what items I got, all from the Forever21 plus size range. I did do a bit of research into what the sizes were like and what the equivalent size from USA to UK sizes were and found it very useful. In the UK I wear sizes 16, 18 ad 20, depending on garment, fabric and shop. For Forever21 I went for the 2X or 3X depending on the style of garment and fabric.

I am in love with the floral smocked playsuit which cost £19, and worth every penny. It is so comfy and has surprise pockets! Always a bonus. I got this in a size 2X,  I am so glad I went for the 2X for this playsuit as it fits perfectly, very flattering and comfy, any bigger would ruin this piece.
The black and white stripey smock dress was £15, also a 2X, fits lovely, floaty and flattering, just a warning, wear a white or nude bra with this dress! Anything else you will be able to see.
Matelasse floral bodycon dress was £5.99 3X., ironically this is the only item I got in the bigger size, but the only item that didn't fit. It was to tight. However, I reckon with some good pants that suck everything in, this dress would be lovely. Time to invest in some sucky in pants.
Plus size floral dress was £13 2X, this dress also has surprise pockets! I do love a good pocket. Loely light material and perfect length, I do not feel the need to wear leggings with this, I normally do with all dresses.

Books 
I finished a few books in the time I have been gone, The Martian by Andy Weir (started and finished whilst on holiday in Thailand) I am in love with this books and film. PLEASE READ IT! Also a couple of easy chick-lit books, On the Fence and The Distance Between Us both by Kasie West, lovely little books, vry easy to read and I thoroughly enjoyed them, good little summer reads.

TV series
FRINGE! I am obsessed with Fringe, in 2 weeks I have watched 4 seasons, nearly onto the 5th and final season. I have been gripped from the start, so many twists and turns and Walter Bishop, I love him. He is spectacular and always has something witty to say, his one liners re amazing.

Food 
I am right in there with my salads at the moment, a cheeky tuna and quinoa salad goes down a treat now that the sun is here. Also, iced coffee, I discovered this marvelous invention thanks to my mum, and I can safely say I am addicted. I now make my own iced coffee, its a hell of a lot cheaper and so SO easy to make. Also, a little shout out to Graze who have got me through the munchies lately, I get a box every Thursday/Friday and its full of lovely little snacks.

Sorry for taking so long to post again. And for this post being all over the place. I hope to post more regularly from now on. Fingers crossed

Love yah
IsThataReddHerring

January wrap-up!

That's right I thought I'd jump on the band wagon and start doing monthly wrap ups. It is also nice for me to look back on each month and see what I've done and things I want to achieve next month and so on.

Fitness
Let's start with fitness. A lot of people in January make it their resolution to lose weight and get fitter, but I started my journey back in October and its going well. But in January I stepped it up a whole new level. More determined than ever to better myself. Of course I've had my ups and downs, slipped up a few times (had the odd one too many biscuits) but I didn't let that deter me. As soon as I felt myself slipping I did something to change that and distract myself.
If I did slip I didn't then force myself to do a 5K run or anything drastic, i simply told myself that 'I am human after all, and there will be times when I've had a really bad day at work, or just don't feel like exercising and you know what that is perfectly fine. I am not going to give up things that I like and enjoy. Restricting myself completely of the things that I love, yes I'm talking about those KitKats, is a silly idea. I tend to crave it more and give in and go on a binge. Whereas letting myself have a little treat every now and then stops me from binging on the bad stuff. In the long run for me it is better. Instead of having 3 or 4 biscuits I only have 1, filling the craving but not causing to much damage. I'm always on the look out for healthier options of my favourite foods. But sometimes I need a little fix!
My biggest achievement this month though is a 10lb weight lose. I am extremely happy with myself and feel a lot more confident. It's nice that people are noticing as well.

Book Haul
As usual I have brought way to many books this month, but my top picks are Deathnote books 1 to 4, which if you haven't read or heard of you must give them ago. Deathnote is a Manga series based in Japan. I will be doing a separate blog on Deathnote and why more people need to know about it. I got a great deal in Forbidden Planet it was 3 for the price of 2 on most books. So I picked up books 1,2, and 4 they were missing 3 :( but went into hmv and there it was so I picked up 3 as well. Each book has two volumes and to be honest they are such an easy read I will finish the 4 books by the end of the week. I got the black editions and they are amazing, so beautiful!

Other books I am really looking forward to reading are The art of being normal by Lisa Williamson , Cinder the first book in the lunar chronicles by Marissa Meyer, The Martian by Andy Weir, and The Reunion of Ghosts by Judith Mitchell. I will be doing reviews for each as and when I read them. 

Clothing 
I may have done a little clothing haul or 3! I brought some very boring things like new socks and underwear, trousers for work... But I did buy some new running shoes well actually two pairs oops. In my defense my old trainers are horrid, they are the typical style you see kids running around in at school for P.E. it was time for a change. I got a good deal on a pair of Sketchers Flex Appeal on Amazon and they are amazing (see picture below) I got mine for £41 and worth every penny. I did a fair amount of research into which trainers to get and time after time these popped up. I cannot wait to try them out properly later on this week at the gym.

I also brought a basic black pair of running shoes. I got these on a whim and honestly they are amazing. Myself and my boyfriend were shopping in Southampton and came across a sports shop I hadn't heard of before called Decathalon. We went in on the off chance there will be something we want. And to my surprise they did a lot of great sports gear for a very good price. So I brought myself a pair of Kalenji (see picture below) running shoes for only £12.99. I cannot stop wearing them.

Favourite Film of January 

Straight Outta Compton. This film was amazing. Contains very strong language but based on the true story of N.W.A, safe to say it doesn't hold back any details or swearing! A must watch, one of my favourite all time films. 

Favourite TV Series of January 

Mr. Robot, Amazon Prime original, it's really good. Very quirky and has everything a good series needs. Highly recommend. 

Favourite Book of January 

The Rosie Effect by Graeme Simison, the second book in the duo-logy, follows Rosie and Don after their marriage and a surprise baby on the way. (Not really a spoiler as its all over the cover) 

Favourite Song of January 

Dessert by Dawin, I love this because it keeps me motivated in the gym :D 

Overall January has been a very good month, a great start to 2016 :D roll on February

Love Yah
IsThataRedHerring

Workouts that I enjoy doing and feel working.

Let's face it working out can be boring if you are doing the same thing over and over again. So when I work out I keep it varied to stop becoming bored and tired and well giving up.

The first workout I turn to is one that I know works. It’s not very adventurous but perfect to do when you only want to spend 45 or so minutes in the gym. It’s simple but effective. Simply its:

• 30 minutes of cardio -  I do it to a level in which I cannot talk to the person next to me
• 15 minutes on the treadmill. High incline and around 3.5 mph. Not too fast but after 15 minutes you know you’ve done a good workout. 
• Then 15 minutes cross trainer, mid-level around 8 or 10. I choose not to use the bikes because I tend to get lazy. But with the cross trainer I can feel my muscles working. 
• I walk around the gym twice as a ‘rest’, then straight into my next part. 
• Squats and lunges. 
• 10 squats and 10 lunges repeat 5 times. 
• I use a 3KG weight for balance when doing the lunges. I step the weight up every couple of days. 

If I cannot get to the gym or it’s a 'rest' day I still do my squats and lunges at home. I am quite lucky that my job keeps me active. Always running and walking around. It's amazing how quickly your heart rate can raise. Even on days when I don't go to the gym I know that being active at work helps.

This week at the gym I've been doing something slightly different:

• 30 mins of cardio
• 15 minutes on the treadmill, 3.5 mph on full incline. 
• 15 minutes on the bikes or cross-trainer. Level 8 or 10 depending on how my knees are. 

Then I go through a routine in-which my gym instructor has given me. It's tailored for me, to lose weight quicker. See picture below:

I really enjoy this work out and you can really feel it working. My shoulders, calves and thighs in particular. Each time I push myself to do more. Heavier weight and more reps. Building it up slowly.

Another good option is the couch to 5K app. It helps with jogging, running and of course motivation. It’s a free app, and can be downloaded on most smart phones. I would really recommend this app if you want to start slowly. 

NHS- Couch to 5K

I hope this has helped, given a few of you a couple of ideas for fitness. If I can do it, anyone can :D

Love Yah 

IsThataRedHerring